2005 is nearly over, and in the spirit of cooperation and spreading good communitst vibes I've put together a list of the most obnoxious, fake and divisive individuals from the proggie movement.
10) Jawad Ali of the MWU poofter division slandered Muslim Fest amongst other Muslim themed events which didnt cater his pro-regressive nonsense. Ali claimed that there was a lack of female participation when in fact half of the organizers were woman. This act of decepetion lands mwu's resident fruit at number ten.
9) Naseeb.com, the online desi meat market aka a website for outcasts by outcasts tried to steal some of ISNA's thunder this year by hosting its own "meetup" at the same time. It didnt go as planned with the "meetup" failing miserably. In true pro-regressive fashion Naseeb ran an vicious and factually incorrect article in its vibes section titled "ISNA thugs" written by some tool named "Umbreen Shah." It also appeared on mwu. All this, while neocon ratfinks were slamming ISNA as well. Don’t even get me started on Irshad Manji and Stephen Schwartz’s articles. This act of petty partisanship and nepotism lands Naseeb.com and its bigwigs at number nine.
8) Exiled and deported Iranians in an act of political transvestitsm have now become "human rights advocates." We all know that communists with blood stained hands make great human rights activists don’t we? Many of these heavily accented green card fame seeking Ahmed Chalabi wannabees are not content merely with peddling misinformation on woman’s rights in Islam but also building a bipartisan consensus to launch a war against Iran with neocon blessings ofcourse. They worked hand in hand with pro-regressive slimeballs against allowing Muslims access to religious arbitration to settle disputes, which was already available to Jews and Christians. Comrade Stalin and Chairman Mao would no doubt be proud with having the Arjomands, Darabis, and hordes of other exiled criminals and charlatans holed up in the west at number eight.
7) Mohja Kahf, MWU’s resident pornographer is quiet these days. I guess the shock value of writing crappy articles which would normally make the grade at Hustler wore off. Or perhaps it’s the cancellation of HBOs “Sex and the City” which Kahf admits inspired her in the first place. I suppose she’ll have to steal what she can from “Desperate housewives,” till something better comes along which leaves her at number seven.
6) Muhammed Ali Hasan, the calamity of birth known as the manchild behind “Muslims for Bush,” aka “Corrupt Pakistani Charlatans for Bush” normally would not make this list. I would not give him the attention he so desperately craves. What makes him number six is not that he was zero credibility, or that he set up a pro-Bush booth at ISNA 2004(which was rightfully vandalized), but the fact that he authored the worst possible article on Naseeb.com titled “Stop Blaming Bush” for the unacceptably slow response towards the Hurricane Katrina tragedy. Even Naseeb’s sheep found the article insensitive, insulting and devoid of facts. But that’s not all. Hasan could not even muster up the courage to criticize his hometown congressman( Tom “anti-immigration” Tancredo) for Islamophobic remarks. How great would it be if Hasan was sent to Iraq, I can only imagine the words he would have for Dubya then.
5) Michael Muhammed Knight, unlike many of his peers can actually write, but it’s a real shame that he doesn’t put it to good use. Knight comes off as a deeply conflicted soul not knowing what he wants or what to do, spending time with pseudo-Islamic cults like the “Nation of Gods and Earths.” He insists that he isn’t a pro-regressive despite what the URL to his blog states, or the people who he hangs out with. He makes the list for his filthly words against the Prophet (pbuh). Normally this would secure him the number one spot, but we have to remember that the jerk isn’t a Muslim to begin with. Did I mention that Knight has collaborated with the likes of Islamophobes like Ibn Warraq and Ali Sina? He claims this was done inadvertently. In light of numerous shenanigans at ISNA as well as impersonating Ibrahim Hooper from CAIR, I just don’t believe Mr.Knight and sincerely hope someone tosses him back in the dumpster he crawled out from.
4) A lot of words come to my mind when I hear the name Asra Nomani : clueless, patronizing, bitter, but above all a LIAR. Already known for her friendship to slain reporter Daniel Pearl, Nomani decided that she wanted to boost her profile even more by making demonstrably false and misleading statements about the Morgantown masjid. The unrepentant adulteress ran for a position on the masjid board and pulled a Nixon when she realized she couldn’t win. Bitter and angry, she starts making claims of inequality at the masjid in addition to citing that her daddy contributed financially to the masjid. Oh I see, so that means that whenever I cant have my way at my local masjid, I can make ridiculous demands, phony claims and even drag a camera crew there because I stuffed a few dollars in the donation box. It’s this sort of convoluted logic which places the disgusting Nomani at number four. If only RU-486 was available in Pakistan…..
3) Amina “the Quran gives me the ability to say no to it” Wadud is many things, obscure academic, race baiter and munafiq extraordinaire, but what put her on this list is leading phony Fridays prayers in a desperate attempt to put pro-regressive Moslims on the map. For a group known its cavalier rejection of the Sunnah of the Prophet(pbuh), it was odd that they would use Hadith, and a weak one at that to justify their innovation in religion. If that wasn’t enough, they went on to claim that a scholar from Al-Azhar supported this act which turned out to be false. Praying for show did get media attention, all 30 seconds of it, gleeful endorsement from ignorant non-Muslims and those who don’t mean the community any good. It may have boosted their profile for a brief period, but to Muslims around the world, this little publicity stunt merely confirmed that these people were munafiqs. Female led prayers are rejected by all sects, schools of Fiqh, scholars and pretty much anyone with a brain cell or two who see it for the aberration that it is. With a swift kick in the kaboose while in ruku we lauch Ms.Wadud into the stratosphere at number three.
2) The snake oil salesman of the pro-regressive bowel movement and MWU supremo Ahmed Nassef is a busy man. The mendacious masri has spent the last few years desperately trying to sideline established Muslim civil rights groups with outrageous claims and misinformation. With his multiple appearances on FOX, CNN, MSNBC and other highly impartial news outlets, Nassef has claimed that CAIR is conservative (defending civil rights is conservative?!), that masjids harbor extremists and pretty much any load of horse manure which is music to the ears of Islamophobes. Universally disliked to the point where some have referred to him as Dajjal (http://nassefisdajjal.blogspot.com/) Nassef continues to publish shallow crappy articles on MWU, even asking pointers from Cheryl Bernard, the author of the infamous RAND corporation report calling for the fragmentation of Islam. Who could possibly top this candidate for an involuntary lobotomy? Who else but..... ……
1) ……......the Brad Pitt(scroll down to read the interview) of the pro-regressive movement. None other then Tarek “I’m Tarek Fatah” Fatah. Why is he our numero uno idiot? Simply because Fatah represents what the pro-regressive Moslim movement is truly about : aging and unaccomplished sub-marxists and virtual atheists from third world countries with a life long inferiority complex and a desire to be accepted, even at the cost of the religion which they don’t believe in. Fatah is infamous even among his own as a notorious egomaniac and control freak. Thanks to him the PMNUA was shattered in less then a year with resignations all around( that’s a good thing mind you). Maybe he wouldn't be such a Jerk-In-The-Box if he didn't eat all those paint chips and lead pencils when he was a kid, if he weren't so fat that buildings bounce when he hauls his sumo wrestler mass down the street. Yeah I know, that’s real mean and all…but I really cant say anything nice about a charlatan who is working hard to make Canadian Muslims second class citizens, denying them equality under the law afforded to other religious groups. Mr.Fatah, in the spirit of Christmas I’d like to express this from the bottom of my heart : You are a piteously lecherous sycophant and a frightful, enema-addicted festering boil on the butt of humanity. You are an egregiously insufferable plebeian and a gluttonous, nostril-offending mutilation of decency. You are a precociously witless mouth breather and a belligerent, all-defiling deplorable calamity of birth. Other then that he's a swell guy. Try not to make the list next year curly.